Hmmm....this meant wiping away the tears, getting out from under the covers, changing my outlook on life, and taking actions to move myself in a positive direction. And maybe, just maybe if I did this and wrote about it, maybe someone else may read about my story and choose now to be the defining moment in their lives to start living with a NOW perspective....turning obstacles into opportunities, sorrows into brighter tomorrows, and tragedy into triumph.
A month ago I saw an immunologist as I was suffering from some sort of environmental allergies. At the same time, my chiropractic neurologist suggested I take another food sensitivity test as something was irritating my belly as well. While the tests the immunologist ran came back as expected -allergies to some weeds, pollen, mold, and mildew - the food allergy/sensitivity results blew me away. It showed I was now allergic to EVERYTHING I was eating. With the combined results, this meant I was developing allergies to everything in the world in which I live. I was now sensitive to everything I ate, breathed, and sometimes touched. WOW! My main question to all the physicians was, Why? As a Lymie, I wanted to know to what extent Lyme was playing into my new diagnoses, how we could stop the reactions, and what can be done to repair the damage that has been done.
Four weeks later, I had yet to receive any type of answer other than "I don't know how to help you. Our typical approach doesn't work for you because you have Lyme. So it's up to you to find a way to help yourself through your own trial and error." And "You need mental help not medical help. I'll get the names of some good therapists for you. Try them on like you do a pair of shoes until you find a good fit. You'll need to like the one you chose for you're going to need their assistance for many years. You must be depressed and/or suffered some abuse as a child which you've suppressed." HUH??? That's it? Case closed. Moriah's dismissed? I found it quite upsetting that those who ordered the testing did not have answers for me other than to tell me I have a problem for which they do not have a solution. While I did greatly appreciate not being told I was a nutcase by my chiro/neuro, I was feeling pretty down and out as I was left to try to sort through the medical mess on my own - once again.
In my search for a solution, a remedy for relief, I read two very helpful books "The Gluten Effect" by Drs. Petersen and "The Lyme Diet" by Dr. Nicola McFadzean. I learned about Leaky Gut and it's devastating effects on one's body and am reading everything I can find on the internet concerning it. Additionally, I had two phone consults with Dr. Rick and Vikki Petersen concerning may case. While they provided some very helpful information, they weren't sure of how exactly to proceed because - to quote - "your immune system is failing but because you have a very complicated and complex case of Lyme we aren't sure how effective any treatment will be." That was my breaking point. The point at which I crawled under my covers and cried. What was I do to? Everything I was eating was poison to me, yet I couldn't not eat. And no one knew how to help me for sure other than me spending a few more thousand dollars on testing and/or weeks of my own experiments- journaling everything I ate, how much of it I ate, in combination with other foods I ate it, and the time of day in which it was eaten - then eliminating the things I had the most reactions to. With nearly 100 foods to experiment with - this could take months. I don't have time to waste and that approach alone just didn't seem too realisic. As a Lymie - I cannot remember much of anything past a few hours and cannot read my own handwriting most of the time. As a mother of five - well, I find it hard to find the time to sit down and eat for most meals/snacks let alone write about it.
So, there I was feeling sorry for myself and simply 'smad' - sad and mad at the same time. Then I saw the NOW ad and my entire focus changed. I will Not waste this opportunity. I will sit down and do the research. I will find ways to help my health improve - physically, mentally, emotionally, and even spiritually. I will become a better me because of of my circumstances. I will rise up and meet the challenges to the best of my ability (still thinking meticulous journaling will not happen but will give it a try). There's too much at risk not to. If I chose to allow myself to stay defeated, I will continue to be a collector of chronic illnesses. I will not live life to its fullest. I will live the rest of my days in pain and sorrow. I will most likely become bitter and a person no one wants to be around for I wouldn't be serving any positive purpose in their lives. I will become a miserable whiner and complainer. And I will miss out on all the blessings God has in store for me and becoming all He created me to be.
IF, however, I chose NOW - I chose life. I choose a better quality of life. I choose to get back the momentum that's been stolen from me. I choose to get back what was lost. I choose to get my life, and the way I think, back in balance. I chose to live life to the fullest. I will be a blessing to others and will add value to their lives. I will be a 'multiplier' not a 'subtractor.' The choice was mine to make in that moment, and I chose NOW.
So what do I do from here? I've come up with a plan - a solution as I am a solution-oriented person. I can handle knowing what the problem is. I cannot handle not knowing how to correct or resolve it. This creates frustration and stress and neither lead to anything good. Back to the plan -
1. I'm making a list of the supplements I will need to repair and recover based on all the research I've done myself concerning Leaky Gut and my crazy, messed up immune system (this includes treating parasite infections and Candida - an overgrowth of yeast).
2. I'll make another list for the supplements I will need to help treat Lyme as soon as my gut has been repaired. Since 70-80% of one's immune system resides in the gut, my gut has to be well before attempting to kill the Lyme. If it's not, my system will be overloaded and the treatment will fail. This is most likely why treatments haven't been effective, or remain effective.
3. Not really sure what to do with the diet. Think, by process of journaling, I'll see if my belly is cross-reacting with rice. I have a feeling it is and treating rice as if it were gluten. It's done this with quinoa and I know it's doing it again to something else I'm eating. Rice is my first bet....but it may be the coconut flour. Or even both. As for everything else, well, I think eliminating the main aggrevator(s) will be very helpful and then we'll just have to have a longer recovery process as I need to keep eating. With hypoglycemia, not having proper nutrition opens up a whole different set of problems, which has happened before and caused me to lose my driver's license for 6months after passing out on a sidewalk and taking a trip to the ER via an ambulance.
4. Search the internet for GF/CF/everything free :) recipes for me and my family. As the entire Cameron Crew carries the gene for Celiac we all must cut gluten out immediately. Plus, cooking for 8 (we have an 'extra' coming to live with us next week) requires some sort of planning. While I like to be organized and have everything in its place, planning is no longer a quality my Lymie brain is very good at anymore. BUT will stretch myself and make my brain think in a somewhat organized manner. (Ask my family how conversations with me go....) HA!
5. After printing out recipes and creating my own cookbook - and possibly buying a few real ones off Amazon - I will create a weekly menu plan AND grocery list. I'll save these on my computer so as time goes on, it'll be easy to rotate them and simply print off a list each week.
6. With the new supplement/treatment plan, I'll also have to have a chart as to when I need to take what - with food, not with food, so many hours after a different supplement or another meal, etc... And not eat certain things I love - like all fruit other than cranberries, POM juice, and granny smith apples.
That's it. It's time for NOW. That's my story. And in the posts to come, you'll be learning what I'm learning and able to cook what I'm cooking as I'll post the recipes as well (and if they were 'kid-tested AND approved' or not). Enjoy your day NOW.
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